Michelle a few days before Heath's death.

Michelle Williams in an interview given a few days before Heath Ledger’s death. 

Looking up at the ceiling, she measures the time passed since their engagement ended. “Six months. It’s been long and not long. It feels like yesterday and it feels like years ago, but not six months. The distraction of work is utterly invaluable. When I have too much free time, that’s when things start to get a little messy.” Tears pool in her eyes. She smiles one of those smiles. “Matilda’s the prize. She’s bigger to me than any relationship, bigger than the awards. She’s what came out of it.”

“Heath and I had broken up—way before it became a news story—and I didn’t know where to go. I couldn’t imagine any place in the world that was gonna feel good to me. When Heath and I first broke up, I did not feel 27. I felt 67. I was like, I’m too young to be feeling like this. I was 26 when we broke up.” It wasn’t Williams’ first heartbreak. “But it was,” she says, “the first time I wasn’t expecting my heart to be broken.”

Michelle Williams Opens Up About Heath Ledger's Death

Almost three years after Heath Ledger’s tragic death, Michelle Williams is opening up about how she has coped with his loss.

Here’s what the 30-year-old actress shared with Nightline:

On Heath’s passing: “In a strange way, I miss that year, because all those possibilities that existed then are gone. It didn’t seem unlikely to me that he could walk through a door or could appear behind a bush. It was a year of very magical thinking, and in some ways I’m sad to be moving further and further away from it.”

On handling the news: “I found meanings around the circumstances but the actual event itself I can’t find a, I can’t find it. I can’t find a meaning for it. I can find meanings in things and people and relationships that have sprung up and friendships that have strengthened. I found a lot of meaning in that but not in ‘why.’”

On giving their daughter Matilda a normal childhood: “It’s going well. We’re doing a good job of it. It is of more importance to me than anything in my life. I would rearrange anything to make that possible. If something starts to encroach on that it’s going to be removed from the equation.”